There is a home where isolated and reclusive young people can feel comfortable.

There is an impressive TV program I saw in Japan a long time ago. It was a documentary about reclusive loners (hikikomori). The child was crying. The parents’ efforts to get the child to step away from the room were tense. At the time, I didn’t have the peace of mind, so I didn’t really understand the situation.

A few years ago, I met another reclusive loner. This time it was the main character in the novel. A long novel ends with the protagonist taking a step outside. For each bookshelf, the protagonist would take a breath, hesitate, and eventually return to the dark room.

Last December, the Ministry of Health and Welfare jointly announced the ‘Isolated and Secluded Youth Support Plan’ with related ministries. The main contents are as follows. A self-diagnosis system will be established for early detection of isolated and reclusive youth, and a youth category will be established at the 129 call center. For the young people discovered in this way, a dedicated support organization will be established and youth challenge support projects will be expanded. We will increase cultural care programs and streamline the management system for field workers. Additionally, in the case of isolated and reclusive youth, we plan to provide a variety of support by assigning dedicated personnel to the Out-of-School Youth Support Center. Previously, in May of last year, the Ministry of Health and Welfare held a meeting with isolated and reclusive young people and Sees, a private support organization, to listen to their opinions.

The child I saw on TV and the young man in the novel overlapped. I was curious. The blue house mole house operated by Seeds has opened. Grrr~ The little tension melted away at their happy greetings.

“A few days ago, we all ate steamed buns together.”

In the living room, a free space, the first thing that caught my attention was the red bun steamer. A cabinet filled with various board games and books and a piano were also visible. The young man sitting in the chair was comfortably reading a book. In the space on the second floor, young people were having a conversation. It was an atmosphere where calm classical music would be very suitable.

Seeds has been working on the independence of the young generation since 2010. It is about making society healthy through international exchange and local creators. Energetic young people gathered together, and they encountered various opportunities through youth policy. Then a blind spot came to mind. This time, on the contrary, we looked for young people who were lacking vitality. It was much more difficult to recruit than before. I thought that young people spend the most time on the Internet while secluded. After gathering in a small chat room, we created the online platform Mole Tunnel for easy management. The number of members exceeded 1,000.

A variety of programs and club activities take place at Moodejip, an offline space for isolated and reclusive youth. It also provides family counseling, professional services, and work experience. We also visit young people who are more deeply reclusive. However, I was cautious that they might feel rejected. I quietly applied after hearing from the secretaries of nearby convenience stores and gosiwons.

“I think it would be good if an integrated center were operated. All problems can overlap. We often distinguish between isolation, seclusion, and youth preparing for independence, but while caring for parents or siblings, they can become isolated from society and become depressed.” Chairman Lee Eun-ae said. He said that in that respect, there is a lot of interest in the center announced by this government. She also emphasized the importance of early identification of out-of-school youth situations. The earlier you intervene, the faster it will be resolved. He believes that the problem becomes more complicated when it becomes chronic.

“There is something I find fascinating about being abroad. “In Korea, the situation of isolated and reclusive youth is said to be somewhat different.”

In Korea, the number of single-person households is rapidly increasing. For example, in Japan, many people live with their parents, but in Korea, they live alone and face a financial burden. Of course, the situation is different for each individual. From that perspective, the young people who come to this space are quite advanced.

“I had a friend who I couldn’t talk to or make eye contact with at first. There were a lot of stories. As he progressed, his talents were revealed in many ways. My friends who worked with me were full of praise. “That’s how he regained his self-esteem, and these days he takes on the role of leader and has become very proactive.” He talked about something he remembered among many young people.

Among the programs here, there is a conversation group. Chairman Lee said that once you visit, you will be very surprised. There, I see quite a few people telling their stories for the first time in their lives. It was difficult to talk about it anywhere, but when I opened up about it, I realized that there were similar people and that I was not as unhappy as I thought. The young people who learned that point said that they truly felt each other’s empathy. So what do isolated and reclusive young people need most?

“It’s a network of relationships. A social network where you can meet comfortably. “It’s hard to find that kind of relationship anywhere, so I created it through a space like this.”

Stories of isolated and reclusive youth

I was also able to talk to some of the young people gathered here that day. Jiyeon Kim (32), Juna (nickname, 25), Blah (nickname, 23). Everyone has different reasons and dates for coming here. The same thing is that I want to come here often and communicate. Let’s listen to their stories.

Jiyeon Kim (hereinafter referred to as Kim): I was severely bullied when I was a student. At home I only played games and at school I just slept helplessly. This trauma continued into the military and employment. This place? While preparing for a job, I searched for a work experience program and found it.

Juna (hereinafter referred to as Joo): I had difficulty interacting with my friends. I came here after finding out about a related place at an alternative school.

Bla (hereinafter referred to as Bla): I was attending college, but after COVID-19, relationships with people became difficult. I found out about this place while I was staying at home.

Their seclusion period varied from a couple of months to 10 years. In severe cases, some young people self-harmed or were hospitalized. The life in seclusion was quite similar. I was immersed in games and the internet in my room. Lifestyle habits collapsed and conversations stopped. My relationship with my family was also not smooth. At least we could chat while playing games online, but we soon felt the limitations.

Kim: I desperately needed someone to actually talk to. After coming here and talking with each other, I gained confidence. There is no need to mix with people here. I think I found stability because I was comfortable.

Note: That’s right. I like that my existence is fully accepted here. Wherever you go, they always ask you what your job is. I have nothing to say, but the other person also feels awkward. That’s not the case here.

Kim: Specifically, it was good to learn everyday skills. At the woodworking club, I learned how to use tools such as saws and made cutting boards. I really enjoyed the garden club activities. I cooked it with vegetables I grew myself.

Note: It’s different from before. While meditating, I feel myself changing. I’m very happy right now.

Kim: I like being able to share concerns and wounds that are difficult to talk about with new friends. Would you say it has reduced some of the psychological pressure? I want to experience many things before going out into society.

B: It’s nice to have a comfortable space. I want to meet many people.

What was good? They said they come every day even though it is far from home. Because I know the power that vitality gives. But I didn’t forget to say that it would be better if it were closer. Additionally, she asked if there were any other wishes.

Kim: I hope there will be more economic support such as youth housing and jobs. I also hope that there will be more spaces like this in local areas and that it will serve as a stepping stone to society.

BL: What if you found out about this place when you were a teenager? It’s really good. I think I would have gone there more often if I had known in advance. There is no need to worry and suffer alone for a long time.

Is there anything more comforting than being able to share similar concerns? The more you deeply sympathize and trust, the wider the boundaries of stability become.

Isolation and seclusion are never lazy or stationary. There are just no words to express it socially. By reflecting on yourself, you can grow and heal more. This understanding is also conveyed when dealing with others. So this process is very important. If we go through these steps well, our society can become much healthier.

The Ministry of Health and Welfare estimates that there are about 540,000 isolated young people. In an era where the number of young people is decreasing, it is also a waste of manpower worth 7 trillion won economically. I just crouched down to run further. We need warm relationships to help us stand up. This is because it can happen to anyone and you can get hurt anywhere. Wouldn’t the world become a much brighter place as we understand and embrace it?

“I thought you were a high school student. “What is the secret to such good skin?”

I asked as I left the darkened door. She was quite surprised to hear the age of one of the people around the table (he was really young). Soon the answer came back filled with laughter.

“It’s because I’m reclusive!”

It was a vivid vitality that I wanted to convey to young people who are currently just staring at the Internet in their rooms.

Mole Tunnel: https://dudug.kr/

Policy Reporters|Yunkyung Kimotterkim@gmail.com

I will take one more step and think twice more!